seriously. my poop always gets scooped. i mean, it's a given, no?
but then we came across this sign which even i could read. christina, my human, just had to take a picture. it's the first sign she has ever seen like this in our country. and that's when i realized...it's the law, and she was collecting evidence of that law.
i poop. she scoops. even though there are plenty of little garbage bins throughout the park at a seated human's level, we always drop-off in bins located outside the park. we are polite like that.
in the past, tula and christina have had to defend themselves against lame people who would blame her for all the poop on the streets. they would often get in heated arguments where christina would have to literally wield all her poop bags (empty sandwich bags) over her head for people to get the picture. even then, though, they thought she was just doing it for show. thought she would only pick up if she were being watched. weird.
once tula heard her address an ignoramus human, offering to run dna tests on all the poop on the block in order to prove that her dog didn't do it. tula had a good chuckle. turns out that in germany, humans might even be offered a reward based on forensic poop analysis. the reward would be a dog food voucher or even a doggie toy. cool!
or there was the time when tula said christina was as cool as a cucumber when she told an older man that she would most certainly not remove her dog from what appeared to be the man's cat-litter strewn front sidewalk and that she would pick up the poop. no, not with her hand, but with the baggie she was waving at him over her head. and that yes, he could call the cops if he cared to!
and then of course the time where she was fed up with being accused of not picking up and scared a widowed old lady into backing down (and away) from her as christina forcefully stated that the lady could also go have a very nice day! echo, echo, echo...
but i was there when tula and i got the death threat from the stinker in the blue car. our poop had literally hit the pavement and within seconds christina had bagged it in front of the wimp who waited to address her from the safety of his car. "you like animals, eh?" um, yes? "well keep them off my road!" but i pick up sir. this time, she held the full sandwich bag up and in front for clear inspection. "pick up! no you don't! i see you up and down this street one hundred times a day! if you ever bring your dogs back i will kill them!"
it took christina all her willpower to not throw the bag of poop at the man's car.
we took down his license plate number and reported him to the police. but if they can't even enforce a dog poop law, you guessed it, they can't even record a threat on our lives.
seriously, humans. pick. up. after. us. because if we could, we would.
